Road Rage

Today I was almost run off the road.  No drama present as I write that.

I was driving on a two lane road to pick up Emerson from preschool and, at a light, pulled into the right lane.  The right lane then merges with the left just after you get through the light.  I was driving a normal speed waiting to see where I could fit in.  There was a clear gap between the two vehicles I was driving beside and so I sped up a little to fit in and was merging in when the truck behind me seemed to be closing the gap.  I sped up a little to continue merging and it then became evident that the truck behind me was not going to let me in.  As the two lanes turned to one I was sure that this truck would back off since they were still behind me.  But this truck had a point to prove and I had to swerve off to the side of the rode so that he didn't plow into me.

I was angry!  Why would someone do that?  What makes that person think that it is okay to treat another person like that?  And is it worth it to prove yourself and end up causing an accident?  Having my son in the backseat only fueled my fire.   I wasn't trying to get ahead of anyone or show off the amazing power of my family car.  I was just driving.  

I thought about all the things I would like to say to this man, if I should even call him that.  I also thought about how wonderful it would feel to call the police and have him arrested (like that would really happen, but the thought made me feel good).  I even wrote down his license plate number when I ended up behind him at another red light.

But where did all of this leave me?  Am I a better person because I didn't run him off the road?  How different am I as I plot out my revenge on this other driver?  Not much different at all really.

He wanted to prove himself for whatever reason and now I want to prove myself.  That just turns into a vicious cycle.

So how do I release myself from this cycle?  I could just forget about it and each time I think about it I will be a little less mad than the last time.  But am I really ending the cycle?  When this happens again (we all know that road rage isn't going away) will I once again find myself plotting my revenge?

And what about things that are bigger than being a recipient of some unknown person's road rage?  How do you stop that cycle of anger?

How do you truly forgive?

I felt God ask me to pray for this man.  I was a little resistant at first, but then I did it.  I didn't feel like praying for him, but I acted on what I felt God was calling me to do.

Maybe that is part of what forgiveness looks like.  Wouldn't it be wonderful if when you messed up someone didn't just come at you trying to prove how you had messed up?  But what if they prayed for you and your heart and whatever you were going through that might have led to you messing up?

That sounds like a pretty good world to me.